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18 August 2006

Insult to Injury

There are few things in life that make me see red more than spam*. As a general rule, I can deal, as I have a ridiculously convoluted and unnecessarily complex system whereby mail from most of my 14 accounts is forwarded to the 'mothership' account where it is sorted, filtered, labelled and even eventually sent to my phone if I am away from a computer for a significant period of time (ie more than 15 minutes).

Recently, however, the mothership has somehow been infiltrated and I have been receiving huge amounts of spam. Generally I ignore it, but this subject header didn't fail to capture my attention:


Just because you're ugly, doesn't mean you won't get laid again.

Since when did spam start delivering personal insults and prophecies of doom? I thought it was all about making things bigger and better and longer lasting - all delivered with promises of riches and magic greater than we could possibly imagine - not this personal affront upon my being.

Feckers.


* Contact me for the full list of things that completely piss me off. You won't be sorry.

4 comments:

  1. Come on. That's kind of funny. And in this day and age that's the kind of message you get in the fortune cookies of dodgy Chinese restaurants.

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  2. Yeah, kind of funny. Look at the bright side, they gave you some credit for somehow managing to get laid already, despite your ugliness. And I'm using you in the collective sense here.

    Let's see the full list.

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  3. I agree with Hamish...post the full list!

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  4. hm, despite the interest in 'the list', i shall refrain from publishing it for the time being. it is full of expletives and may take a while to rewrite it for public consumption. or, i'll just post it when in a foul mood and don't care if i manage to offend an entire nation of people.
    whatever comes first.

    ReplyDelete