3 January 2007

The Beautiful are Super Powerful

It has been almost a year, but I am still on my quest to find soap that doesn't leave me smelling like a cud rotting in a cow that was culled during the great foot and mouth debacle of 2001.

It is not just for your benefit, dear readers, that I continue this research, although I am all too happy to report new findings for your bathing safety. No, it is for my countrymen that I am so vigilant - so that no one in Tokyo need ever experience again the unwelcome odour of the salaryman. The odour of which I speak is most often encountered in summer, but this crusader will not rest for she wants to ensure an odour-free 2007 summer for all Tokyoites.

In keeping with the high-falutin' throw-the-money-around lifestyle to which I have become accustomed, I was shopping today in the 100yen store. Armed with some stylish, yet practical,
mop slippers, I was about to head for the checkout when I was struck by an image: an image so great I knew I had found the holy grail of soap.

This soap gives you Super Powers. Oh yes, bathing with Lux will make you beautiful, and this in turn will give you Super Powers. From the photograph on the packet -- current Tokyo fashion, but circa 1983 for the rest of the world -- one could safely venture that this soap has been sitting on the shelf since Tony Hadley first told me I was indestructible. Gold.

So, for your latest bathing pleasure, I present LUX - Beauty Gives You SUPER POWERS.

Go forth, one and all... bathe, please.


  1. LOL. I'm still waiting to be immediately able to ice skate, rollerblade, run fast, look fab and slim in tiny, japanese-size briefest knickers, swim at speed and trampoline one after the other, after using Tampax! Perhaps it's Lux i've been lacking as an add-on?

  2. Damn!
    I bought one to take in the bath with me but there was only bloody soap inside!

  3. lynn - as a superhero, i can safely tell you that tampax will not give you super powers - you need to be chosen. or, failing that, do what i did and nominate yourself and just tell everyone you're a superhero. pretty soon, they'll all believe you (i know they do...) and you can go around saving the world. stick with lux anyways, and you'll leave a nice wafty scent in yer wake.

    dive - looks like you luxed out with yer purchase!

  4. Whats all that soap milarky about?you're scaring me. 12 beers gives me super powers, weemen can't resist me and I'm really really funny, so funny that others just don't get it, and I'm bullet proof as I've never been shot yet.

  5. Okay then Gaijin Girl, well it goes without saying that i always leave a nice wafty scent in my wake, being a perfume junkie. It's usually Jean Paul Gautier or Chanel though, rather than Lux. Though, i am tempted to buy a bar and luxuriate in the bath waiting to be bestowed these powers.
    Twelve beers, Old K? The smell is strangely sexy, i admit, though the effect; not so much.

  6. You can tell it's good soap because it has a pretty girl on the package.

  7. LOL what a find! I love the 100 yen shops. I'm currently using Dove Green Tea soap which fortunately doesn't smell milky...but there are no attached superpowers ;)

  8. old man - i keep finding random soap that doesn't actually make me smell very good so i'm on a mission to find a good one. think i'm onto the right one now if it will enhance my superpowers.
    do you not like washing or is eau de beer your cologne of choice?

    lynn - on my budget i sometimes pop into a department store for a spray of my fave lancombe - other than that it's superhero lux all the way.

    forty_two - trust me, always trust the pretty girls. we, i mean, they wouldn't lie to you, would they?

    vk - i agree, the 100 yen stores rock. my favourite thing really was the mop slippers as i'd not seen them before. too funny.
    the green tea soap sounds good. i shall implement it as part of the research.

  9. Her eyes. So full of dirty intent, yet cleansing.

  10. kieran - i agree, but i think she looks dirty full stop. er, no pun intended.
    not sure if the photo i took shows it clearly, but there's a heap of stuff hanging off her eyebrow like frog spawn. she looks like she needs a good wash.

    thought some of you might be interested: her name is dian sastro and she's an indonesian model/actress. just so you know :)

  11. She makes me feel dirty enough to 'almost' use soap.

  12. o k - i guess the marketing worked if all you fellas are suddenly feeling all dirty.

  13. I sense a good export item here.

  14. hey sassy, i've been lurking on yer blog for a while and was just about to introduce myself over at yours. thanks for stopping by.

    excellent suggestion, too - er, can i interest you in a crate of lux?

  15. Of course, if it had a bovine, a pretty girl, and George Bush saying something dumb that would be really expert marketing.

  16. forty_two - see, you did it again?!